flashbacks ;sweetmisery

Friday, September 30, 2005

{please stay, don't go away
the hardest thing is letting go of you}

I THINK im addicted to my comp. i cant keep myself off it :D ahh. but next week must practise self control. ~~bloody fucking~~ exams are much more important. HURH. english paper was quite alright :D having exams in the hall = sweaty palms + lotssa snifflings + lotssa rubbing of hands together + jackets :D went up to the gallery first to put our bags. whoa. the view of the hall from the gallery :l there were rows of tables with pieces of paper on each table. nerve-wrecking. totally.

yayness for me (: kahwee ended up not the one beside me. joel is! hes on my right (: HAHA. and another unknown 3i guy on my left. poor joel was sick, SEXY VOICE. he said that hes voice finally break xD uber hilarious. and throughout the exam he was sniffling. i was sniffling too, cos of my sensitive nose. so there was lotssa snifflings going on. HAHA. it was uber cold. i was still cold with the jacket :l almost didnt know what to write for compo. inspirations! (: had recess. and back to the hall for paper 2. stupid summary. i didnt know how to do ): whatever.

had lunch and chem remedial aft that. some of the guys walked off. almost did, but in the end decided to stay. had a lil NAP (: im hopeless at chem. i need one on one. SIGHS. remedial ended early. so me cheyenne anet went cwp to find the others. sinhui was with us too. were talking about xiaoren and jlo. HAHA. sinhui then went to find fish and ling while me cheyenne and anet went to the library to look for the rest. naw. the library was too quiet for my liking >:( hahhs. left and went down to macs. it was raining UBER HEAVILY. we ran back in the rain to cwp. thoroughly wet. COLD. pathetic. but fun :D went to the toilet to dry up. then walked arnd a while before going up to the sixth flr where that breakdancing crew used to breakdance at. its quite deserted la, except for some malays. i continued my sleep there :D then left with cheyenne and min.

it dunch feel like exam. SHIT. i need SERIOUS HELP FOR MATHS AND SCIENCE >:( 72 and 73 marks respectively to pass ): im hopeless. very. errps. ah. an unknown neighbour commented that im pretty! :D though i know im not, thats great ego boosting (: she made my day! hahs. but i guess she said that cos i pressed the button open and waited for her patiently in the lift. HAHA. im an ugly asshole. how nice. (: im off. tata.

9/30/2005 07:24:00 PM

Thursday, September 29, 2005

{you tear me down with the same thing
there's nothing the end, it's begun}

a few more hours, EXAMS :l
i wunch be blogging for the next few days, i guess, cos of the examinations. ahh. STRESSED ): somemore its in the hall. kns. i rather it in class can. hahhs. im sitting beside kahwee. how nice. HURH. at least ive got yuenchen behind :D but we're like sitting right infrnt of the aircon. its gonna be cold. jackets! :D

had to lug home all the books under our desk. mine is a HUGE pile, and sadly, it was raining damn heavily. left with yuenchen first cos the rest were dilly dallying. and the stupid dictionary was damn extra can. lols. managed to get my books home all unharmed in the rain (x had a bath and went out again to meet up with the rest for grp study at buddyhoagies. only kelvin phebe and cheyenne were there. then shimin came, followed by xiuanpin yuxuan ahmah anet wenqi. then fiona and john came. then the fat zongyuang. hahhs. did a lil bit of maths. and got distracted by my phone. LOL. ate yuxuan's cheese fries which squirts oil (x couldnt study at all :P we left at arnd 7.

im uber tired. am gonna try to memorise the letter writing format, then its sleep for me (: or else i bet i'll be falling aslp halfway through my paper tmr. hahhs. and theres still chem extra lesson tmr after the eng exam. SIAN. hurhh. im off now. CIAO.

9/29/2005 08:16:00 PM

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

{please just don't play with me
my paper heart will bleed}

ONE MORE DAY -
exams. english. in the hall. omfg >:(
it seems as if our school starts examination a tad earlier than other schools. SIGHS. but, think of it again, anet's right. its only like, 2 weeks more to exam-less days :D am sooo looking forward to that twograce CHALET (: okaes. thats like, still a long way off.

didnt blog yesterday cos didnt feel like it. HAHA. im like, bored today. so, yea. WCB called me ling gabriel and kailing during reading period today. uber embarrasing cos its like, everyone must have thought that we kena scolding or what :l argh. turned out that it was STILL becos of the laolao thing ): rwahs. he wanted us to find laolao to apologise. and he wanted us to find him before he does. FUCK. how did he expect us to do that? bloody ass. luckily we saw laolao on the way to the chapel. or else confirm kena somemore school service for nothing de. ahh. laolao's hilarious la. i was laughing through the apology and he insisted that me and ling were insincere. LOL. like we care la (:

the rest of the day was quite a bore. im totally exhausted frm gawd knows what. anet is too. and both of us seem to just keep on sleeping. how nice (: recess was GREAT. cos ___ with that puahbeh voice had to SOUND and LOOK puahbeh infrnt of me. TSK. how SHALLOW. we were laughing our ass off abt her whiny voice. is she crazy or what? oh. somebody says she is :D after recess all of us were like, high. thanks to phebe (: then ___ with that puahbeh snding voice scolded us bitch. like, what the fuck. for nothing can. we werent in their way or what lurhs. fuck. but WE, being the uber NICE PEOPLE, werent affected by em (: ahh. we scolded back la. and i tnk they stunned dio. HAHA. stupid puahbeh de, pot calling kettle black, not that we are kettles la. but they are the pots. definately. HAHA (:

jake kena raped during laolao's period. LOL. how nice. he almost got into a fight with biantai de. guys... and suddenly it didnt seem as if it was the exam period (: but thats for a short while only. sadded. anw, XIAOREN HEN KE AI :DDD ahh... im off to COMPLETE my fnn le (: ciao.

9/28/2005 08:28:00 PM

Monday, September 26, 2005

{what you are doing is screwing things up inside my head}

3 days left to exams not counting today. ahhhs. how dumb can i get? i reminded anet that theres a geog test today and i myself forgot all about it. and i didnt even know of the maths test we had today. rwahhs. im screwing up my studies ):

ahh. obviously i DID NOT bring my chinese textbook again today. how to?! i haben even bought it. teehee. me and ling walked out of laolao's class again. this time gabriel and aaron got sent out too. cos they made laolao felt like he was a monkey. HAHA. then after that he wrote down our names, saying he want to send us to steven. fuck. didnt expect him to really do it. we got summoned to that walking cb. FUCK. i rushed over to 3i to find ling (cos i was on my way to the needle work rm) and we went down to the dnt rm after pulling our socks skyhigh :D

ohwell. laolao was very worked up can. and he CANT speak english. i bet wcb dunch even understand what he was talking about :l so in the end, wcb told laolao he wld settle it and sent him off. awww. how nice. a time alone with that wcb (: he said stuffs like us being disrespectful and rude and blah and how gabriel can kena caning... erpps. middle fingers behind our backs :D in the end we had to name our own punishments. so LAME can. apologise to laolao and ask if he need us to help him out in anything, or else is report to mr juhari until like, 5. in other words, we kena sch service la. ahh. my second time in one term (: couldnt find laolao after school. so reported at the dnt rm. wipe the chair with my ass while ling swept the flr and aaron and gabriel wipe the window. ahh. that nice CHUBBY teacher let us off early after telling us lame stuffs la (:

went over to causeway point to meet up with the rest. they were studying a-maths there :l rwahs. so i was just fooling arnd there with kelvin. hes still doing that XIAOREN saying bye thing -.-" i managed to slap him, finally :D but he slapped me back -.-" errps. and its hilarious the way phebe always kena fooled by him. HAHA (: but really very xian mu my twinaiiaii cos she and that idiot so en ai can :D hahhs.

ANW im beginning my mugging.... (: ive decided i aint gonna stop. LOL. oh. ive just been reminded of that aftnn incident in 3i :l i despise those people, another bunch of puahbeh de. this time even got qia charbor lehs. TSK. i feel sry for guanghe. and for victor, gawd knows what happened. but its like, i see naw wrong in being close to an opposite gender. HAHS. good friends mahs. cannot mahs? (: ahahhs. okaes. i shall MIND MY OWN BUSINESS. umms. try. hahs. im off (:

9/26/2005 07:29:00 PM

Sunday, September 25, 2005

4 more days to that eng eoy exam liaos >:( i still cant do that stupid maths and sci. and i dunch wanna do em. bleahhs. absolutely naw interest. more interested in watching that tian guo de jie ti :D my mom borrowed the vcds from someone. hahhs. but its like, i watch until so... umms. dunno how to say la. cos keep dragging until i also dunch feel like watching. ahahs.

ahhhs. and ive got my e730 :D teehee. dad went to buy his phone this morning. then he gave the remaining voucher to me :DDD ahhs. so surprising that he actually let me have the remaining cos its like, ive just bought a new cam (x ahahs. now i can save up to buy that ipod nano and need not tnk abt saving up to buy a new phone (: hahhs. but since he bought me the new phone, im like, expected to get better results lurhs. SIGHS. this kinda thing my dad need not say out loud de. bleahhs.

arghh. i have to do fnn. gawd knows what im actually supposed to do. TSK. im off now.

9/25/2005 07:45:00 PM

Friday, September 23, 2005

{i said i better look away
before he sees the tears in my eyes
if i smile, that's a poor disguise}

today's great. had 5periods of slacking arnd. HAHA. took lotssa photos (: the OBS people came back today! ahhh. miss some of em so much (: ohwell. its real sad that i missed that camp. SIGHS. im still feeling sore about it. TSK. oh yea. there was some career thing going on in our canteen today. got some pamphlets. I NEED ALOT OF STUDYING TO GET INTO MASS COMM. -ponders ): my studies suck. sighs. nvm. i shall jiayouu :D

had that choir grad ceremony today (: it was a happy one. except that phebe cried, and joyce had to comfort her. HAHA. took lotssa photos again. had fun (: had buffet aft tt. and the bball guys had food to eat too. LOL. tmr grp studying and bball again. must rest de mahs :D ahh. i dunch want that maths remedial. >:( hmph. okaes. im off now. photos will be uploaded HERE.

9/23/2005 08:42:00 PM

(: ALTO ROCKS

9/23/2005 08:41:00 PM

candidates (: YUSONG GOT THE CHAIRMAN POST. hahs.

9/23/2005 08:40:00 PM

the SEC4s :D

9/23/2005 08:39:00 PM

ling.me.joyce.anadee.fiona. :D

9/23/2005 08:39:00 PM

phebe and joyce. a farewell hugg. how sweet (:

9/23/2005 08:38:00 PM

us doing singout (:

9/23/2005 08:37:00 PM

choir ALTO !!! thats us. we rock :D

9/23/2005 08:36:00 PM

... the sopranos (:

9/23/2005 08:35:00 PM

... and thats the choir baritones (:

9/23/2005 08:35:00 PM

Thursday, September 22, 2005

{so by keeping her heart protected
she'll never ever feel rejected}

time's flying so damn fast and tomorrow's friday already. ahh. im so glad and so so so relieved that miss cheong didnt realise. rwahs. but i feel so darn guilty la. nvm. im already trying my best for pac (: umms. then the chem test today was quite alright la. hahhs. im kinda exhausted today cos i stayed up to do some revision yesterday :D miracle right. exams are coming. ive got naw choice. sighs.

tomorrow's the choir farewell, i tnk. ahh. am so gonna miss the seniors. they're the ones whom we are more attached to lurhs. SIGHS. must take alot of photos. hahas. ahh. friendster's so uh, 'html' now. LOL. i guess they must keep up with competitions bah. hahhs. okaes. im off now. ciao.

9/22/2005 07:43:00 PM

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

{i'm lying here tonight
and I can't stand the pain
and I can't make it go away }

ahh!! im like, struggling so darn hard with my studies. i seriously am having the feeling that im drowning. hahs. but im really struggling hard with my studies. i dunch know anything and im like, failing things that most are passing ): i get so pissed with myself then. i dunch really know what to do cos no matter how much i listen in class, nothing seems to go into my head. arghh. and i really dunno what to do. im getting hysterical cos exams are just a few days again and im just so distracted. fuck.

me ling and min went buddy hoagies again after school for grp studying. we saw this really really weird guy in his fifties. he was suddenly talking to us, telling us dunno what thing abt eggs and wad square de. then he was like, must study hard and stop laughing -.-"" like, what the hell. he also said something like, the person who gets the last laugh can last the longest and kept telling us to study hard. hurhh. scare me. we dunch even know him can. then at buddy hoagies, we took the window sit (: and suddenly this old man sorta glided outside us lurhs. i freaked lurhs. cos he was like, staring in. i bet he's hungry. hahhs.

had golden fried chicken (: yums. then me and ling started imitating those act cute de charbors in friendster... "i lurbe euu forreberr!!!" ahahhs. how hilarious. and all those pouty, smile-without-showing-teeth smiles with those handsigns and stupid captions like, "thinkingg uff euu. cannt live wiithhouut euu" ewwww. how shallow. hahas. and shimin took our retarded actions with my phone. had a good laugh :D then i started doing my pac. then we went hme.

ahh. im struggling with my work. and yes. i know i did say previously that i aint gonna login so often now. its only for a while today. SERIOUS (: oh yea. and ive got a new boyfriend! joel (: and jake is my lover. hahs. it happened during chi lessons. so crap. and i absolutely have nth to do with ashley. naw naw naw. ahahs. i still have yiyuan as aiiaii, ling as my lesbian partner and phebe as my twinaiiaii. ahh. concubine next issit. HAHA. thats what you get frm boredom. hahs. im off now. ciao.

9/21/2005 08:04:00 PM

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

{can you leave me here alone now
i don't wanna hear you say
that you know me}

i seem to be always getting into trouble. hurh. and im always so worried for myself :l ahhh. im dumb. im real sorry anet. heh. everytime have to get you into trouble wib me de. sry sry. errps. ahh. im so not gonna do it again. at least for PAC la. hahs. and tests :l hmmm. i wanna jiayou for pac. struggling... hahhs.

school was quite alright today, i guess. i actually stayed back after school for pac hmework clinic. and i tnk its useful (: i wanna go again on fri. hahhs. now miss cheong knows my P&L accs is really bad. and she send me a sms to encourage me. how sweet can she gets? :D lurfe her to bits. im really sorry. i just didnt want to hand up a white sheet of paper. arghh. im so gonna buck up on other sbjs too and stop pondering abt IRRELEVENT stuffs. darn. the teachers are right. theres only like, a wk and a half left. SIGHS. time does fly :l

so i guess, i aint gonna log in too often in the coming days. i wanna concentrate on my studies. ehem. for the first time (x and im not gonna laze arnd just to spite people. sighs. i need to check my attitude. suddenly i feel like crying again. hahs. im kinda feeling so troubled. damn la. theres chem tmr after school. sighs. i lurfe chem okae. frm today on. HAHA. im off now (:

9/20/2005 08:11:00 PM

Monday, September 19, 2005

im so disappointed in myself. im supposed to be strong. i aint supposed to cry. but i did. all because of my bro. my mom. sometimes i really hate em. fuck. life's real unfair. so what if my bro's the young one? so what if hes a guy? hes damn fuck up. but this time rnd, i got my way. mayb its cos of what i said. hahs. mayb its because of my tears. if it is, i'll be fucking upset with myself. the tears just flowed. i was alrdy feeling out of sorts before this. i dunno who im becoming. this big emo wreck. this big asshole. i dunch wanna cry. but the tears just keep coming. fuck. all because of a stupid comp. how dumb. i shld have gone to camp, i told my mom. i told her i shldnt even have cared what they think. i shld have just pack and go. fuck. i told her, i wunch be rushing back hme everytime frm outings anymore cos i dunch even tnk she cared. i tnk she only cared abt the bloody washings. hurh. i told her. im not gonna care what they tnk anymore. im only making things hard for myself. like anyone at hme bothers. so what if im the middle child? HELLO. who ask you go listen to some bloody aunty who says the second child is always the most difficult one? fuck la. im surprsied at myself. my mom took the cane. its been a long time since i had contact with that cane. HURH. i guess i deserve it since i slap my bro hard on the head. but i didnt exactly feel the pain. instead i cried because i was really angry. and im pissed that i cried. but at least i got the comp. and i rebutted my mom by saying its worth it to slap my bro all because of the comp cos i wanted to slap him for a damn real long time. im a mean sister, but no one wld want a bro like that. but think of it again, i tnk my bro's like me. thats why we can never get along. OKAES. my anger's vented (: i bet things are gonna be back to the same tmr. its like that everytime. but i hate myselelf for letting my tears flow this time. damn. i needa keep my temper in check.

school was fine today. fnn practical exam went on just fine. i lurfe my potatoes!! nice (: umms. forgot to bring my two eggs. lucky miss ang got extra. LOL. hmm. had mini-feast in class after that (: huixin's cookies are very nice. hahas. then went for choir. went out to get my pac book with ling and we went down to the councillor rm half way. said hi and went up to the music rm again. hahhs. then during break fishy came up with fufu and told her someone go draw my pict in the HPT notice board. HAHA. i was reading, then i tnk she expected big reaction frm me. LOL. but i continued reading la. hahas. i was thinking, since im like, kinda high profile this few days must have got people dunch like me de la. so who cares. HAHA. and i bet the coloring of my face is done by some shallow puahbehkias la. so who give a damn. EVE ROCKS!!! ahh (: i lurfe my friends (:

ahh (: he msged me. IM HAPPY. and things are fine between my kp bro and me le. ahahs. im off. (:

9/19/2005 08:10:00 PM

Sunday, September 18, 2005

{confusions}

people. im replying tags here frm now on. cos that tagboard is so tiny. LOL.

MIN >> is not the pictures gay. is the person gay can. chang er lahhs. ahahs.
LING>> waddaya expect. LOL. its sensored!!! sensored. of cos penise aint sensored la. that word is science can. HAHA. ***** is plain RA lurhs. thats why. hahs. that guy is pure RA. lol. EWW.
JY >> oops. accidentally de . LOL.
ANET>> uh lele (:
FISHY>> link liao le.

okaes. tomorrow's my fnn practical exam and im gonna suck. its even difficult to buy those stuffs can. im so gonna hire a maid next time. WAHAHS (: i so hate BEEF now can. its so difficult to buy. darn. anw, that jerrk haben msg me yet. guess hes not gonna do it. i dunch care le, i tnk. im tired of waiting. im off.

9/18/2005 05:42:00 PM

Saturday, September 17, 2005

maths remedial kinda sucks today. boring. lols. so its kinda like, i slept through it lurhs. hahs. after that waited with yuenchen for hafis, then took the train hme with sinhui. spend the whole time at hme sleeping (: nice. after that bathed, and went out to meet with the people :D me phebe fiona ahmah shimin jolene cheyenne anet xiuanpin jiahui wilson victor yuxuan jake joel john yusong (hopefully i didnt forget anyone). yepp.

was feeling kinda out of sorts at first. but once i started playing, my mood turned better :D basketball rocks. ahahs. we saw those people whom we played with the previous time. that monkey face guy and those girls. ohwell. kinda had some disagreements i tnk. our people thrashed em :D okaes. not exactly thrashed. but we won em la. thats nice (: umms. then i was there irritating people with my camera :D esp xiuanpin aka chang er (: after that we had dinner at macs tgt :D i had to treat joel :l errps. but nvm. had fun :D after that we went hme.

hmm. bro kp liaos. im off now. enjoy the picts below. the rest shall be posted HERE (:

9/17/2005 11:31:00 PM

THE PEOPLE, to dinner (: ignore chang er. lols.

9/17/2005 11:21:00 PM

thats joel, held by gor and yuxuan. so ke ai right. LOL (x

9/17/2005 11:16:00 PM

ahmah, shy chang er and me :DDD

9/17/2005 11:14:00 PM

aww. hes shy (:

9/17/2005 11:11:00 PM

thats our chang er (:

9/17/2005 11:08:00 PM

Friday, September 16, 2005

{maybe thats what i shld have did,
so long long ago}

i just realised the word pussy (eww!!) is like, sensored. GIGGLES AND SHAKES HEAD- i shld have known that words come out by expected-castratis are RA. LOL. its beginning to get hilarious la. so yepp. ahahs. i tnk this is the way (: make fun of people whos making fun of us. in the end, we arent the one who lose :DDD see, im right in not being angry ( :

im planning to cut my hair shorter (: hopefully i wunch regret. ahahs. horror movie on next. no more pbk to disturb me :D i finally went ahead and say no, instead of just trying to tell him in a nice manner that i dunch want. LOL. but still need to see whether he will continue msging me. but he can be so nice though. wadever. and for that JERK (points up), im still confused. no more pondering for me though, at least for today. looking forward to tmr! and i dunch mean mrs ang's maths lessons. pouuts- i want basketball!! ( :

9/16/2005 10:43:00 PM

{I DUNCH GIVE A DAMN (:
we thrash people.
we dunch get trashed :D}

HAPPY BIRTHDAY XIUANPIN (:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAD (:
horrible day. i went to school half drenched. i had my red fila umbrella (: but i sheltered two person to school. yiyuan and nadirah. so its like, a bit pointless la. assembly in class. anet had to help me do my chem again :l anet i heart you. xie xie for your help. ahahs. played netball for pe. we thrash em! yayness. its 17 to 6, if im not wrong :D walking cb never come again. good. had 5 periods with mrs soh after recess. they were planning a 3joy class outing after the exams (:

felt like ponning choir after school. but didnt in the end. psycho ashlee is famous. heard frm ling that miss seh had to escort ashlee out. so pathetic. and The Who is like, eww. i've said that for a gazillion times. im going eww everytime i see him. hes seriously ewk. so anw, went behind school to eat. i just had enough money for chocolate and a can of pepsi twist. so yepp. saw some phs de. they started shouting crap things. i freaked. dots. now i tnk i pulled ling down into the water with me. real sry, but... seriously, welcome to my life. ahahs. so yepp. we ignored those people. and left the place at arnd 3. im disgusted by the msgs, whoever sent em.

ahh. shimin reminded me. she said i dunch seem angry. i just realise it. ahahs. mayb is cos i tnk getting angry over some childish kiddos are no use bahs (: so i need not bother being angry. im just, rather pissed by their behavior. wadever. im not gonna bother myself abt em (: so yepp. choir was alright. fnd out abt gor de thing wib ex sis in law. i thought they were like, very sweet de lurhs. didnt expect things to turn out like that. SIGHS. but gor is a very nice gor la. ahahs. crap.

hmm. im feeling much better now (: can breath easier. ahahs. kkaes. im off now (:

9/16/2005 08:10:00 PM

Thursday, September 15, 2005

ITS OVER
i tried so hard to get over HIM.
now i can. finally.
though it hurts a teeny weeny bit,
(actually its less than a teeny weeny bit)
im happy (:
and i find him hilarious. anw
next time, photos shall be uploaded
HERE (:
and im pissed with friendster. tsk.
im off.

9/15/2005 09:34:00 PM

{what if you should decide
that you don't want me there by your side
that you don't want me there in your life?}

im bored. uber. ashlee went crazy again today. threatening with the chair again, and scolding fuck you. like anyone would want to do that. hurh. caused me SOME embarrasment. what the fuck. i was in some totally unglam position. hoho. heck. im owaes looking unglam :l hehh. saw The Who like, twice. eww. i cant stand the sight of him. accks.

ear worm. home in that rock. LOL. anet has to put up with me today ((: school was fine. except for chinese period. tsk tsk. walking cb didnt come today, no socks spot checks :D umms. went buddy hoagies again after school. had macs for lunch before that. saw zhenting :D its been so long since ive last see him. ahahs. excepy for the carnival la. but that was like, i saw him frm far. yepp. waved (: at least he haben forget me. lol. slacked arnd in buddy hoagies. then went home at 6plus. wasnt really in the mood for anything. ahahs.

i guess my comp's gonna die on me sooner or ltr. SIGHS. thats sad. exams coming. just realise i need to get like, 72 marks for my maths EOY exams and 73 for science to pass my total. im neba gonna pass em. sighs. im in no mood to write anymore. im off.

9/15/2005 07:23:00 PM

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

{i can't let go
i don't want you to know}

today was fine. tiring, again. slept away during chinese period, but was suddenly hauled to the dentist with yuenchen. tsk tsk. i hate going to the dentist cos im like, uber afraid of pain. but surprisingly, i wasnt really scared today. instead yuenchen was like, more afraid than me. ahahs. uber hilarious. my teeth was clean (: so i didnt really need any cleaning. and thus there wasnt any pain at all. LOL. yuenchen finished her cleaning with blood over her teeth. ahahs.

anw, dexter sucks. ewwwwwwwww. OMG. he thinks hes some teacher or what, i think. during chapel, he knocked on our pew TWICE or THRICE cos some of us were like, sleeping. I WAS PISSED can. then we started a lil bit of whispering. i mean. who will not talk the entire time in the chapel? erps. and he hushed us. FUCK. i turned arnd and scolded him kb. dammit. what a fucking bloody dickhead. ewwww. he think he rocks like that. thats like, EWK can. errps. and hes disgusting can. i just cant stand him. i mean, who can? hes The Who lurhs. the one everyone detest dislike hate is disgusted with and blah. ewww.

okaes. umms. so yea. after school we went buddy hoagies. long time since i had that flame grilled chicken. yums (: then had a lil bit of headache. so was like, sleeping down there, reading mags (: the rest were doing pac and stuffs la. SIGHS. my studies suck. im gonna brush up on em. yes yes. i'll try. goodness knows how many times ive said that. ahahs. so yea. btw friendster's like, so blog-like now. i dunch really like it. hmm. whatever la. im off (:

9/14/2005 07:44:00 PM

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

{hey, you see that guy?
he's the one that wrecked my world}

argh.
my blog page keep jamming on me. im pissed. ohwell. thats the reason i didnt blog yesterday. but yea. ytd was unlucky for me. very. woke up with a bad hair day. AHAHS. and i couldnt tame those curls. so i rushed out of the hse like that cos i was like, going to be late. had spotcheck. and i got caught for like, everything. mainly my socks la. so kena 2hrs school service. whee. first school service in my school life :D

made banana sponge cake during fnn. OHWELL. ut turns out... erps. lol. after school reported for school service with phebe anet yuenchen sinhui huixin sarah. quite a crowd (: there wasnt any school service for us to do. so we stayed in the dc rm for dc. lol. mr chan left the rm for a while. and we went kinda crazy (: guess we were the loudest down there. but who cares. everyone hushed when mr chan returned. ahahs. had fun. went for a lil while of choir, then home (:

today was tiring. i was kinda lethargic. and became depressed. LOL. not exactly, but yea. brooding lots. had english oral after school. quite crap la. then went khatib bball court shoot a few hoops with phebe shimin anet wenqi ahmah and kelvin. yepp. was feeling a lil bit better la (: and kelvin is seriously one big crap la. tsk tsk. he refused to gimme back my phone cos he was trying to send that mp3 file. in the end phebe had to leave first. he tried sending the file again, just to have another not enough space thing on his phone. so he had to return me the phone. lols.

ahh. mengchao's friendster kena suspended. so my first friendster acc fine liaos. now im stucked with two accounts. i feel dumb. tsk tsk. i shall see what i can do la. SIGHS. im off.

9/13/2005 08:40:00 PM

Sunday, September 11, 2005

my new skin's done. comment on it please :DDD umms. ive uploaded the handover pictures. just click HERE to view (: i shall upload the steamboat photos the next time. yupps.

9/11/2005 09:53:00 PM

{I'm taking my time
I'm trying to leave the memories of you behind}

didnt blog yesterday cos it was late by the time i got back home. the handover ceremony's finally over (: umms. guessed everything went on just fine. reached schhol at like, 10.10 with phebe and anet. we were late, but still, the others were still in the canteen. kailing wasnt there yet, and it was HOT. then we realised the seminar room door can only be opened at arnd 1.30. something like that. kinda pissed. cos i could have had a longer sleep :l went hme at 11plus to have a bath, since everyone was slacking down there in the canteen anyway. phebe went with me. bathed. then rested a lil before leaving my hse. ahahs.

went back to school and helped out a bit with stuffs. everyone started changing (: things started to get a bit rushed. the decos were not up and i realised the 6 rolls of flourescent paper was not enough to cover the lights for the seminar room. everything was kinda confusing and everyone was rushing arnd, getting pissed. but i guess everything was settled at last. the grads and the sec4s came (: certificates were handed up and blah. andy was made camp chief, char made the assistant camp chief, clarinda the opts, reagen the logs and sherry the publicity. cheers :DD then after that andy kena raped. the guys are like, sick. ahahs. ate the food prepared by sinhui and fish and watched the powerpoint presentation. then phebe, yiyuan, daniel and me left to meet up with the rest for the steamboat (:

saw gary and one of the grad on the way to the mrt station. they asked us to go play pool with em, but we were meeting the rest, so we didnt accept. xiuanpin yuxuan victor kelvin and shimin were alrdy there when we reached the station. then we waited a while for jolene. took the train to marina bay next (: haggled with the aunty for free drinks before taking the mini van to the steamboat place (: ahh. i prefered the place where we celebrated me and fish's birthday, but at least we got free 3 bottles of sparkling juice xD ahmah wenqi jiayan and zy then came. quite a party :D daniel was a bit too hyper yesterday la, and everyone was kinda lamed by him. was great. i think everyone had fun :D the guys were burning all sorts of things on the fire - richola plastic container, paper and i saw daniel trying to burn the chopsticks :l yiyuan was trying to juggle the clams in the cup. he even tried fishballs. eww. and he kept dangling food in my face. bleahhs.

took a grp photo at the 'red light district' staircase of victor's bowling place. HAHA. went to the arcade next. me wenqi and jy went back first cos it was getting real late. reached khatib at arnd 11.15. errps. me and jy then parted ways. was crossing the road when jeb suddenly appeared beside me on his bike. lols. he walked me home. how nice (: was dead tired by the time i reached home. ahahs.

today's boring. slept, then went library with my bro. sighs. shall change my blogskin ltr on, tho its not really completed. photos shall be uploaded too. im off.

{I'm gonna be fine
As soon as I get your picture right out of my mind}

9/11/2005 06:32:00 PM

Friday, September 09, 2005

{YOU, the only one who can
make my insides wracked with anxiety}

today's okae. im finally getting enough sleep i think (: yayness. choir was the same. ahh. its like, totally embarrasing to carry a huge bag with 6tubes of paper sticking out. FUGLY. go ewww, people. but i guess its better to bring em to school today than to bring em tmr.

AND speaking of tmr, its the handover. at long last :D but all of a sudden im so not looking forward to it. rahs. i dunno what im supposed to wear and stuffs. SIGH. i shall see what i can do ltr. hopefully, things will turn out well tmr :D imma gonna take lotssa photos. haha.

ahh. lemme go try and finish my new blogskin. im off. ciao.

{'cos you're the only one
who can turn me around when i'm upside down.}

9/09/2005 07:56:00 PM

Thursday, September 08, 2005

{you gave me nothing 'cept for heartaches
now im outta it, naw jumping in somemore}

i love basketball and i love those people (: my mood's better now. went for group studying just now. found jiayan in buddy hoagies with huixin xinyi justina and winnie :D stayed there for like, half an hour and did a lil bit of chem :DDD then i asked jiayan to accompany me go macs to book sits cos yuxuan msged me to tell me that they'd be late.

umms. i helped em book the tables, and in turn got a few death stares from some girls studying there. HAHA. cos they were going to the sits initially when i ran there and dragged my bag onto the sit. errps. i guess they were pissed. LOL. then jolene came, followed by shimin xiuanpin and yuxuan. zy came next. ahh. the guys were hilarious. crazy people (: phebe then came with kelvin, and cheyenne came the last. sat there for a while and tried to study. but i was stucked at the bloody chem question. then yuxuan and zongyang couldnt stand it anymore and went down to the bball court.

me and jolene then packed up and went down with xiuanpin, followed by shimin and cheyenne, followed by kelvin and phebe. hahas. and xiuanpin is a huge gay cos he kept complaining he was melting :l the sun was huge, yea. we played bball and were sweating like hell at the end of the game. screaming does help in a game. LOL. had a break. water (: then anet came. played somemore. ahmah and fiona came, and they kept buying water for us. nice :D slacked there for quite a while and had another game when we stopped suddenly. so abrubt. slacked there till arnd 7.15 before i went hme. ahh. kelvin finally realise i was the one who tried to take him and phebe at the carnival. LOL. and there were all those craps about phebe being adam. and she was saying she forgot to eat her apple today. LOL.

so yea. right now im working on a new blogskin, and hopefully someone wunch call and interrupt me again with all those crapshits. ahahs. umms. so yea. im off.

{hopefully he'll come along soon,
and pick up those pieces for me}

9/08/2005 08:02:00 PM

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

{but i can't escape the truth,
i will never be with you}

im irritable again, huge emo wreck right now and i might just break down and cry for nothing. hohos. watched initial d, finally. its great. just that i tnk jay chou cant do crying scenes cos that scene was so fake. HAHA. anw i went shopping with my mum at causeway and came back even more pissed. SIGHS. im like, binging on chocolates again. m&ns. yea. and i dunch even like em. i prefer kitkat chunkys. but i cant get em. out of stock. rwahs.

so im like, at home, brooding, pacing, blah, and i definately dunch feel like doing homework. ARGH. who wants the day out tomorrow???!!! rahs. or mayb who wants the day at buddy ~~horny~~ hoagies? wakahs. i'd rather do my homework there than at home. yiyuan did ask me whether i'd like to go there to do pac. i feel like playing a lil bit of bball :D mayb that can make me feel better. heck. i shall ask arnd ltr.

i wanna change my blogskin. ARGH. im pissed cos the only thing i can do right now is stare at the bloody page of html infrnt of me and not have any feeling to do anything. life just sucks right now. im gonna try again ltr. or mayb i'll just get some bloody blogskin at blogskins.com cos im just so tired of my present skin. anw kh's selling ice cream arnd the neighbourhood. but he's assigned to blk 800plus there, i think. teehee. he cant come and visit me like he said he was going to (x i wanna work for the bloody bucks. i want to buy so many stuffs. BLOODY HELL. someone buy everything for me please. hurh. im getting more of a wreck as i am writing, so i'd better be off now. damn.

{At night I pray
That soon your face will fade away}

9/07/2005 06:40:00 PM

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

{how can it be easy to forget you when i think about you all the time
i never know how imiss you when i never had you, you were never mine}

i suck again, now. umms. i mean my mood. sucks.
baby faith's not coming tomorrow.
mum's free to go shopping with us.
but i dunch feel like going.
actually, i dunch feel like going out with my mum.
thats so mean. but yea. im afraid. argh.
not of my mum la, duh. of somethings else.
what the fuck. crap.
i just cant put some thoughts down in words.
so, its whatever la. they sound stupid.
fucking bunch of craps.
my comp hung on me.
see. thats the kind of things that will happen when you're down.
i dunch even know why im down.
TSK. i'd like to do my head in sometimes.
even making skins dunch help now.
tomorrow will be better. hopefully.
HELP.

{it'd be cool if we never met, if we never locked eyes
then i'd feel so happy, not knowing you're so fine}

9/06/2005 09:57:00 PM

{but help me heal these wounds
they've been open for way too long}
basketball still rocks (: yes yes.

haha. i didnt get my, uh, long sleep after all. SIGHS. cos my mum wanted to wash the bedsheets early in the morning and woke me up at arnd 9.30. but at least i was rested :D i tried to do chem (: umms. managed to finish, uh, 2 qns :l good enough for me. heh. helped mum take care of baby faith. shes soooooo ~~fat~~ chubby and uber uber pinchable ( KAILING, SCREAM! ). ahahs.

jianing and jingning came by in the aftnn with my big aunt. crazy girls (: they found my deodorants and insisted on spraying both types on themselves until i had to throw the deos up my cupboard. LOL. they ransacked my cupboard and fnd my precious earrings. i had to hide those as well... and they almost made me go out in a pink tee with pink pants (eww). OHWELL. i tnk they took me as their barbie doll or what. thats what you get from horribly cute lower primary school kiddos. i escaped from their clutches fast enough. HAHA. jianing's swimming alot now and she has a really really nice tan. i want that skin color! ahahs. more time under the sun for me pls (:

ahh. speaking of sun. it was like, burning hot at the court. its been quite long since we last played bball tgt (: so it was like, nice. there were me phebe cheyenne jolene anet chenning xiuanpin zongyang john kelvin yuxuan wilfred and jiahui (hopefully i left no one out). ah mah fiona and shimin sat at the court to watch. hmmm. after we played, the guys had their own game. then the girls (us) had their game. ahh. then xiuanpin chenning and wilfred played with some unknown people. there was this guy in black who smoked. and i seriously cant stand seeing smokers doing sports. i mean, what right do they have? ahahs. thats a bit too serious la, but its the truth. we stayed at the court till arnd 7, and then hme we went.

im missing dinner for the second time in my life :D thats real lame. ahahs. mayb i'll have some sara lee cake ltr. im really happy anet like the blogskin that i made for her (: i guess i dunch have much confidence in myself. BUT, really thankew thankew. hahas :D im off now. ciao.
{help me fill this soul
even though this is not your fault}

9/06/2005 07:56:00 PM

Monday, September 05, 2005

{i think you're just a problem,
so stay the hell away from me because I don't believe in you.}
today's okay (: went to school in the morning for FNN. test was cancelled :D good good. i didnt do my coursework at all, other than printing out the already done decision making. went home halfway with wanlin to get my edusave form and 30bucks. ahh. i told wanlin the taxi fare was gonna be at most 3 dollars plus. so we flagged a taxi and got onto it. wanlin started laughing, saying that the meter was starting at 2.40. LOL. so it was no way we're gonna get to my hse with 3 dollars plus. ahahs. so yea. the fare was exactly 5 bucks. i tnk its quite worthed cos it was hot and the car was cold and there was tv in the taxi (though its rather dumb, showing a man talking to a car. nuts. HAHA).

got back to school and went for choir after a while. was rather boring. sighs. went to the amk shelter for the hpt meeting. the people were like, hiding at the multi storey carpark. LOL. so we went up, meaning to trick jack. the whole bunch of us there, like illegal gathering. haha. finally we saw jack came. he looked arnd the shelter and see no one. so he walked back to macs. the rest of us rushed down to the shelter and pretended that we had been there for a long time. LOL. had a lil bit of fun la, though its crap. HAHA. discussed about stuffs and went back.

anw theres this guy called patrick who added me in msn. he says hes 20 yrs old, chinese, living in the amk area, and he asked me whether im open-minded. ahahs. i rmb there was once this unknown guy ask me that too and started talking about masturbation (EWK), so i replied still can la and asked whether he was going to talk about perved stuffs. HAHA. he said yah. lols. then he asked me for my age. i said 15. and he stopped replying me. i bet hes some sicko la. LOL. then see me too young for those kinda stuffs. what an asshole. hahas. friendster's getting pretty dangerous worhs. LOL.

my eyes itch. sighs. hoping to shoot some hoops tmd :D long time never play bball le. HAHA. kkaes. im off. ciao.
{this conflict is my own
keep your sources away from me
that's all}

9/05/2005 09:02:00 PM

Sunday, September 04, 2005

{ever since i found you
i wanna be around you }
just got back frm sijie's house. the party (: uber fun. it was raining damn heavily in the early part of the aftnn, so sinhui and me decided not to go. but kahwee called and said that sijie's parents had already bought the food for the steamboat, we felt bad and decided to call up the others and see who can come. me ling and sinhui then decided to meet at yck mrt station at 3.30. i was late. errps. received ling's call in the train that sijie's dad had arrived at the station to pick us up. the train finally reached yck. coincidentally, i saw kokheng. but didnt stop to say hi cos i was late. his friend saw me running down the escalator though and told him. he called me on my phone. dots. got into the car. ling fufu brenda and wilson were already in the car. waited for sinhui (im not the latest. HAHA) and went to sijie's hse.

ahh. the people were playing mahjong. sijie's dad helped us chose a movie from two full file of dvds. initially we thought the show was those RA kind cos of the cd cover. HAHA. but it turned out to be a really very nice movie :D acted by jackie chan's son. nice nice. cycled arnd the neightbourhood with kahwee next (: the houses there are like, huge. went back after a while and realise that the rest had went out to fetch denise. so i sat in the living room and sang karaoke with siting and brenda (: the rest came back and we sang somemore. haha. had steamboat dinner next. OHWELL. i was sabo-ed and had to sit beside sijie. tsk tsk. even the two guys (siting's friends bahs) whom i dunno helped in the sabotage. SIGHS.

the food was nice though (: me and ling kept taking food for each other :D jack came. sat arnd and chatted about the sectwos and training camp. very nice (: i really think that our hpt sec three batch this year is much more bonded :D after that we cut through that bullion park condo again to get to the bus stop. sijie told the security guard that we were going to this bbq. LOL. went back with sinhui and fufu, and i was telling em im the youngest among the three of us :D heh.

im dead tired now. busy day tomorrow, and ive just realised i haben study for tmr's FNN test. wakahs. and i haben done my coursewk yet. rwahs. heck. i'll see what i can do tmr. haha. anw, i tnk ive exceeded my sms quota by ALOT. sighs. i'll try to sms less. lols. im off now. photos shall be uploaded in my msn space. visit!< NITES PEOPLE (:
{lost and broken, hopeless and lonely.
smiling on the outside, and hurt beneath my skin.}

9/04/2005 10:27:00 PM

Saturday, September 03, 2005

` i duunch -

wakahs. thank gawd. my dad only wanted my memory card. thinks hes in urgent need for it or something :D good good. i still gets to go out without feeling guilty or what. -BEAMS. anw, am soooo surprised that faiz's in the YLDP. that northland sec organization thats similar to HPT. and yea. he knows shannon. thats so qiao (: and he rmb me :DDD thats so nice. hahas. okaes. im hungry now cos i missed dinner tonight. wakahs. im off now (:

-

9/03/2005 11:09:00 PM

{I wonder if I'll ever see the end of this
With all this rain it just keeps falling
On my head and now I'm calling
Out to someone else to help me make it through }
im back from some window shopping done (: met out with sijie xavier kahwee wilson yiyuan phebe char and anet (hope i didnt miss anyone out. lols) in the morning at yck mrt station. went to the hawker behind the school for breakfast :D jack fish ling sinhui vanessa joined us afterwards and we went back to school to get denise. ahh. surprisingly, the security guard didnt stop us from going in :D went to sijie's hse next.

okae, fine, his hse is like, nice. and his twin sista siting looks like the bleached white long hair version of him. HAHA. and his lil brother junjie is soooooo keaii (: also botak de. lols. sijie's parents are great too. his dad is like, so nice until all of us wanted to acknowledge him as our godfather. wakahs (: ohwell. the rest were teasing me abt sijie and it was so embarrasing kaes. dot dot dot. his dad set up the karaoke thing for us and we were singing there. LOL. the Sbox. hahas. he also ordered pizza for us and sijie's mum asked if we wld like to stay for a steamboat dinner. arent they nice? hahas. aft eating the pizza, we sat at the table and chatted with sijie's parents. they're nice people. totally cool parents :D so yea. sijie's one lucky guy. his dad also showed us their family photos (: and there was this really hilarious photo of sijie in a business suit taken in those kinda studio. LOL. the guys then went to play bball while we girls stayed and gossiped in the living rm (: then we left, but i think the guys stayed for the steamboat dinner. hahas.

me sinhui and fish then went sunplaza to shop for clothes. well. em shop for clothes. me gives comments. HAHA. im broke la. before that sinhui had alrdy bought this really nice black flowy skirt at 8bucks (only!!!) frm this fashion at north point. so she was looking for a top to go with it. fish went to try on her dress. it was kinda too big for her, so she didnt buy it in the end. couldnt find anything nice in sunplaza. so we went over to causeway point. i bought my anklets like, finally (: and theres like, an offer everywhere :DDD im such a sucker for cheap stuffs. lol. there was this metro shoe sales la, and fish bought this pair of heels and sinhui bought a pair of green pumps which are like uber uber uber nice. i wanted the pink ones! but i dunch hab the bucks. -bangs head on the wall. SIGHS. but i dunch tnk its wld be worth if i bought it cos its gonna be so difficult to match my clothes with :l but i want those cute shoes la. -pouuts.

went home after that, and my bro told me my dad called before i came back just to ask if ive reached hme not. errrps. i smell smething bad. SIGHS. i bet my mum said smething to him. rwahs. i dunch care la. they can think im turning bad for all i care. and hopefully i wunch get grounded or stuffs like that cos ive got soooo much to do during the hols. yeaa. its beta if nth's bad gonna happen, and im so not showing my result slip, yet. sighs. im off now. i need good luck and lotssa sugar. ciao.
{I will try to believe in the things I cannot see
But my faith is shaken now like it's never been before}

9/03/2005 09:09:00 PM

Friday, September 02, 2005

{so let's take this knife and run it down your chest
does this feel like love? cos thats how love feels like to me}
so yea. school was fine today. tiring, but theres only one sbj that we study today that needs thinking - chemistry. lesson was fine though. threejoy rocks (: i mean, i lurfe our attitude. wahahs. spent the 3 periods of english writing the uber long letter to phebe. hahs. then we went to the seminar rm for the wad la. hmm. got back my result slip, though the marks still suck, im quite happy la, cos most of the sbjs improved :D im still failing science, and surprisingly, humanes too. ive never failed humanes before. whats wrong with me. heck.

decided to miss choir to go buy the handover deco stuffs. dryrun tmr's cancelled. aww... but that gives me more time for the card (: so its half good news half bad news. almost fell aslp in the canteen while waiting for ling. ling was in turn waiting for mrs soh. went amk jubilee next to get the stuffs. tired. i could like, fall aslp walking. couldnt find the balloons. -pouuts. popular sell 50 for like, 7bucks. thats so expensive. so we decided to go behind our school buy. went value dollar shop. eww. most stuffs in that shop are like, ewk. yea. i guess the nicest things are the tealights, which we bought. the stars on em are so nice can. lols. hme after that cos ling felt like sleeping too.

its the hols next week. but somehow, we're so busy it just dont seem like the hols. im troubled over some stuffs, but i shall try to remain like that, cheery (: yes yes. i shall. and im so looking forward to the handover. 7 days left :D yayness. im off now. ciao.
{There a chill in the heat
Feel the sky at my feet cuz I adore you
I cant ignore you}

9/02/2005 07:19:00 PM

Something I Never Had - lindsay lohan

Do you see me
Do you feel me like I feel you
Call your number I cannot get through
You don't hear me and I dont understand
When I reach out I dont find your hand
Were they wasted words and did they mean a thing
And all our precious time but I still feel so in between

[Chorus:] Some day I just keep pretending
That you'll say dreaming of a different ending
I wanna hold on but it hurts so bad
And I can't keep something that I never had

I keep telling myself things can turn around with time
And if I wait it out you could always change your mind
Like a fairy tale where it works out in the end
Can I close my eyes have you lying here again
Then I come back down
They I fade back in
Then I realize its just what might have been.

[chorus] Am I a shadow on your wall
Am I anything at all
Anything to you
Am I a secret that you keep
Do you dream me while your sleeping after all
Some day I just keep pretending
That you'll say dreaming of a different ending
I wanna hold on but it hurts so bad
And I can't keep something that I never had
That I never had
I wanna hold on but it hurts so bad
And I can't keep something that I never had

You dont see me, you dont feel me like I feel you

-

9/02/2005 07:09:00 PM

Thursday, September 01, 2005

{The static and the noise you got my attention
It made me wanna live}
today's okae. no school, more sleep (: ahh. ive been so tired from the lack of sleep. met up with fufu ling and fish at amk mos burger. surprisingly, i was the first to reach the place. ERPS. the rest were at the train station and i did not see em. whats wrong with my eyes, dude. saw jiayan keith and xinyi too. surprise surprise (:

the people came and we sat down and started crapping. sinhui came and we continued crapping and camwhoring :DDD in total, we didnt really do anything for the handover at all, except that fish and ling made ~~a few trips~~ a lot of trips up to popular for the pens. stayed there for a long while (: sinhui made a call to the jerrrk cos she was bored. she called and asked for chunfu. LOL.

we left at arnd 5plus cos fufu and sinhui complained that they were hungry. made a trip up to popular again and made that manager experated. LOL. we went down to polar cakeshop and bought eclairs while waiting for ling to go hme and change. saw one of the puah beh de. the one that reminds me of a bald rat. lols. whatever la. went back on the train myself cos they wanted to go for dinner. saw keith again at khatib. so qiao. waited for fufu they all on the next train and got the stuffs i left with em back. i knew it. rahs. i dunch wanna bring em back to school. errps :l stupid kahwee la. never answer his bloody phone.

anw. i asked my mum for new clothes. wakahs. typical reaction. she says ive got alot alrdy. hmphh. i dunch care. i want the pmk racerbacks (: and ling is getting her zen neeon!! UNFAIR. lols. i wanna get mine too :D but i'll have to wait. SIGHS. im saying for the umpteen time, i need cash. loads of em. hahas. im off now. ciao.
{and its so hard to live a dream
when the everything that they want you to be
is anything but me}

9/01/2005 07:20:00 PM